Masculinity Model
Knowledge and Muslim Masculinity…
The key to completing Muslim Masculinity is having the knowledge of self. The Prophet (s) said that "No man knows himself better than he does." The next level of knowledge is having the knowledge to some degree of the tangible and physical created things. The next level of knowledge is when there is knowledge of the metaphysical and the unseen created things, which brings you to the last level of knowledge which is the knowledge of God, Allah, who created and defined masculinity for all men on earth.
Quran and Muslim Masculinity…
It is the conclusion of the fouth day of Ramadan. After reading the Quran for a few hours today, it really is the definition of Muslim Masculinity. It is where we men are trying to aspire towards in the completion of our Manhood. When the wife of the Prophet (s) , Aisha (r) was asked (after the Prophet (s) had passed away), "What was the Prophet's (s) character like?" She simply said "He was a walking Quran." As far as I believe in my heart, every man should be like the Prophet (s) or they should die trying to be like him. He was simply the ultimate man. It is he (s) who I base the Masculine Development Model upon. Why would I pick anyone else?
Male Bonding and Muslim Masculinity…
I was talking to some brothers yesterday and eventually we got onto the subject of the struggles of being married and Muslim Masculinity. I guess you could call it Male Bonding. I had some extra time this past weekend so I went to the local Muslim Owned restaurant called the Fish Dock. I stayed there for most of the day which was about 5pm to 11:30pm. We started discussing community issues and then it blended into personal lives.
Anger and Muslim Masculinity…
"A person who is angered quickly shows a sign that their ego still has a grasp over them"
I found this saying to be one of the most profound statements that I have heard in a long time. Like many of us, I come from a family line that has a quick temper. Anger is something that I deal with and try to control to the best of my ability on a daily basis. The Muslim and Non Muslim men nowadays see anger as something very masculine, like it is a strength. I beg to differ. As stated in the masculine development model, the epitome of strength is self control. People can and do control others when they know what emotional buttons to push. It is arguably one of the most prominent ways that women with bad intent control men in detrimental ways.
How to Treat a Woman…
I do not profess to be an expert on Women. I doubt that anyone except Allah would claim that with confidence. But I do know how to treat a woman. There are a few basics to keep in mind that most people forget. These points are things that I have experienced throughout my lifetime through talking to people, taking in experiences, studying, reading, researching, and simply living the natural trial and errors of life.
Hard Work
Hard work is something that is part of our destiny to our completion of Manhood. Putting hard work and making a difference in the world through your efforts is a trait that we as men must naturally have. Part of the emasculation that occurs in the impoverished and the minority communities is a lazy and bad work ethic. I am not talking about people who do not have jobs or are going through rough times. I am simply stating a mental and spiritual phase that unfortunately most of our brothers in humanity possess. We as men must move beyond our state as it is unhealthy for us to have other women, children and men who do not invest in our community or loved ones make decisions and provide for us.
The G Word
Eventually I was going to have to address this topic especially being a Mens Issues blog. That topic is gay males. My beliefs in terms of faith and principle are the foundation of my being opposed to the practice of homosexuality in both males and females. I understand and can sympathize that people can have feelings for others of the same sex. However the practice of same sex intimacy and relationships is where I am apposed to. One of the main reasons is that there is a severe lack of perpetuation or sustainability of the Human race. No reproduction comes out of it. Another reason is that homosexuality goes against the physiological and spiritual nature of Man. The clearest of proof is by simply observing your genitals. Your hands were created for you to use to grab things and eat. Your feet help you walk and kick and stand. Your nose is meant to smell things and your ears to hear and your eyes to see. Thus your penis was made to inject semen into a vagina, thus creating the beginnings of new life.
Strength and Manhood
I believe that the greatest strength that a man can have is the ability to control himself in all facets of life. True strength is the only way to attain complete manhood. The way that strength is portrayed in media and everyday life is the exact opposite of that. It is seen as something glorified and strong to have a lack of emotional self control and psychological well being. It seems that the more that we give in to our own whims, then the stronger we are. Those who do not do so are belittled and made to be humiliated. This is a backwards way of looking at strength. One of the main meanings of strength is the ability to endure. The most constant attack on us is the desires that come from within ourselves. Most people are not interested in working on themselves in that manner. So how do we begin to become stronger? The first thing is to identify what makes us weaker.
Fear and Responsibility
The way that we handle fear and responsibility are vital to our journey to the completion of our manhood. Both fear and responsibility are present inside all of us men, but what separates men from boys is how we deal with fear and how we handle our responsibility. I am defining fear as a chronic and potentially crippling avoidance to engage in someone or something. Merriam-Webster Online defines fear as an unpleasant often strong emotion caused by anticipation or awareness of danger. I define fear as something different than being scared. Being scared can most certainly become a function or manifestation of fear, but it can also be something temporary.
Halim’s Masculine Development Model for Males and Men
Taken from my blog on Niyah
Let’s face it; most women do not know how to properly pick a man that is best for them since it’s an emotional decision in picking a partner (it almost always is). It’s like buying a house. You see the house and feel all these things and if it hits the heart a certain way. Then you want it and you already see it as being yours. The reality is that the house may have everything you want but not necessarily everything you need. The same goes with men. They may look great and have lots of money, but they may also not give two cents about you, your issues, feelings, your community, your family, and so on.
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