What is in fact being tease by the woman and the life of this world is something that cannot be touched or held. It is the peace and pleasure of God. We as men are fooled by the notion that if you smoke this substance, if you lay with this woman, if you own this much stuff, then you will obtain that. This is completely false. So why do most of our brothers go along with this charade? It is a lack of spiritual sight. Everything in masculinity comes from the first stage of the Masculine Development Model: Principles. When a man holds certain principles then it gives the foundation for you to see the truth. Most of us have experienced that the truth of Allah is not as it seems to us. When we lack principles, then it takes away our vision and our spiritual foresight. We are no longer aware of things that make sense and start to rationalize things that do not make common sense. This is when we know we are being tantalized.
 

Life is just a tease. We make it a tease because we tease ourselves into this irrational thinking that if we indulge in something physical, then spiritual pleasure will be the result. Most people are conviced if you give them enoough money then, they will be happy in their heart. Muhammad S said that 'contentment is true wealth'. Contentment is the spiritual state of being pleased with what Allah has given us as human beings.  So no matter what we have as individuals, we should do our utmost to be happy with it, especially when God blesses us with abundance.  If we keep buying into the phony power of the almighty dollar, sexual encounter, drug, or power, then we will be in eternal tantalization and will never get the carrot at the end of the rope.

©2012 Halim Naeem.com. All Rights Reserved.

There is a tremendous amount of wisdom and lessons that can be taken from this statement. There are things that happen inside of us that lead us to say bad things or useless things. In this statement the Prophet S guided us to have control over the gateway of emitting the tests that we have inside ourselves. That is to say, we may get angry or feel wronged or slighted. We may even be right, but the Prophet S instructed us to guard the tongue that conveys and spreads that negativity all over. This shows us that Allah will test us on the inside. That is inevitable. However, it is what we do with the tests that we have on the inside that we are judged for.

The same goes for our private parts. The Prophet S did not say "do not be attracted to women." He said to guard our genitals. Its not the attraction that is the sin. It is act we do because of our attraction. This puts the owership of salvation into our hands which is very healthy for us as men as we want to possess as much control over our destiny as possible. Sometimes the urge may seem unstoppable and impossible to resist. For some of us, it may approach that status, but most of us know deep down, there is something deeper. The proof is this: after you are done having satisfying sex, then what do you think about? Is your mind revolving around the next time you will have sex or does your mind wander to other matters? For most of us, we mentally move on from that act until the next time we are in a state of sexual arousal.

The control over these two simple pieces of flesh will guarantee us paradise. This is for a reason. It is not easy to contain the urges that flow out of these two parts of our anatomy.

©2012 Halim Naeem.com. All Rights Reserved.

What I have found is that women are much more experiential than men are. The experience of connecting and the rebeautification of self is what arouses at the deepest level. This translates into the connection between people. So how you connect with the female gender is paramount. The first thing is to have a proper intention. The proper intention is to get yourself closer to Allah with everything you do. Furthermore, if you can get the creation around you closer to Allah along with you, then that is better. The creation around you includes Women. You must want to get better, and closer to Allah in your interactions with women and the people. This must be the top priority. However it is not that simple because a decent portion of the women we meet daily we are attracted towards. Once a physical attraction comes into play, the the intention starts getting confabulated.

When we are able to move past this phase which goes in line with the Masculine Developmental Model and hold strong to our principles through our fortitude, then we are able to keep our three levels of respect. The first level of respect is the respect for God. This means getting towards a level of belief where you begin to live life as if Allah is right next to you. The second level of respect is that towards yourself. This is where your principles come into play from the Masculine Development Model. When you have principles for yourself then, regardless of how attractive someone is and how seductive they become, it does not sway you from your own personal beliefs and values. A man without principles is nothing. The third level of respect is that towards the woman. The woman comes last because if there is no respect for God or self, that whatever a woman wants to get from you, or get for you, she can get it, even if it is against your own will. She can get it against your own will because a man without self respect or low principles has no internal foundation that can weather the storm that people and their desires will throw upon you. Your self respect is the foundation of your principles. Your principles are the foundation of your manhood. Your manhood is the foundation of your being and who you are as a man in society.

Women have that intuition, but many times, they do not know it. The base of nature for a woman is to draw herself to the rebeautification and the reinforcement of the value of her soul. That comes in infinite forms throughout this world in the hundreds and thousands of groups of people that inhabit this planet. The one common denominator is that a woman want to consistently be beautified (in her own eyes, and her own way) and to reinforce her value (in her own eyes and her own way). In this particular society, most women are taught and socialized nowadays to be attractive, and really, nothing more. Attractiveness and physical desirability is the primary channel of drawing the attention needed to rebeautify and reinforce value of herself. So men are socialized to treat women on the basis of their physical and sexual desirability.

There are a few problems with that. The first big issue is that the physique has nothing to do with the woman and many of us men reading this know that all too well. Males simply get the experience they want from the body of their desire, then they move on to another one of their liking. This leaves a trail of unfulfilled and devalued souls. Not only are their souls devalued, but us men begin to devalue and hate ourselves for funnelling our self worth and our masculinity to simply how many women do we got numbers for and how many can we get naked with at will. Most people get this perception perpetuated by mass media and their peers. It gets to a point where the males of society (as in most males here in America) feel in the depth of their heart that all (or a significant portion) of masculinity is simply how many woman can you sleep with. The people who feel that way are severely confused souls.

There are a few basics after the fundamental levels of respect in how to treat a woman. The first thing is honesty, which includes being straightforward, not in a rude way, but simple and straight. The second thing is to simply be yourself. I know millions of people say this, and one of the reasons I have come to realize is that you will draw people to you (if single) or draw attention to you (if not single) that is not suitable for who you are as a person and where your situation is in life. The second thing is to make sure you are pleasant and approachable. I say this to my Muslim brothers especially because sisters and women who are in danger will more likely seek help and protection from you (which is your God given duty as a man). If you are cold and unapproachable, she may not seek help, protection, or much needed information from you since she thinks that you are not a helping spirit. Now this may draw some unwanted attractive attention to you, however, the three levels of respect are your shield from unwanted evils that is the source of your personality. The greater good is the ability for a sister or a woman to feel they have real men to depend on and protect her if in danger.

The last simple thing is to treat a woman more than the desirable piece of flesh that stand before you. There really is much more to her than that. There is much more to her that will benefit you. Remember in the Quran that Woman (Eve) was created from Adam's body. So there is some secret, some part of ourselves that reside within them that can most certainly be the key to our success if we only knew. There will be more pieces on how to properly treat a woman, but this should suffice for now.

©2012 Halim Naeem.com. All Rights Reserved.

We have spiritual aspects that we must fulfill. Women are apart of that spirituality as they bring out something in us. They present us with the ability to test ourselves and our desires and strengths. The completion of Manhood and our destiny has to involve both men and women into that spiritual journey. Men support and reinforce one another in the journey and women provide the level of intimacy and support where they share along with you the man the creation and development of new life in our youth. We want our communities and our locales to be sustainable. Plants grow, die in the winter, then come back again because they have something sustainable. Now I have heard the argument many times. "There are so many kids out there who need parents and families they can go to; we already have plenty of kids to sustain Humanity." That argument may hold some wait temporarily because the vast majority of people are sexual exclusively with the opposite sex. Lets take this further though. What if most people were gay? What if everyone was gay? Humanity, due to lack of reproduction would eventually become extinct. So perhaps it is most healthy to keep homosexuality to a bare minimum. What would we show our youth in terms of how to treat the opposite sex in terms of perpetuating families? It could very well be that women and men would not be able to have functioning enough relationships, nor the desire to attain that to the point of creating family and sustaining Humanity. These are some of the issues raised. It is definitely a test and a struggle for all of us to complete our journey to Manhood. Homosexual acts and leaving out the other half of the Human Race in terms of perpetuation is definitely one of those struggles to be overcome.

©2012 Halim Naeem.com. All Rights Reserved.

Men have The Three Hungers of Men: Food, Lust, and Ego. The first one is food. Many of us have a special relationship with food, whether it makes our body feel extra good, it can help us deal with stress; we may associate eating with deep thought, tranquility, or peace. Sometimes this relationship and the desire for food can overtake us and begin to rule us as we evade controlling our appetite at all costs. If we continue down this path as many of us know, then we simply become or appetite and we consume and try to quench a hunger that is really everlasting. We should treat our hunger as something like chronic condition, which is we treat it and put it at bay because if we simply. There is nothing wrong with hunger or food, but becoming hunger and becoming the food we eat (full of fat and sugar) is something not many of us men desire.

The second hunger is lust. Since puberty most men have this hunger that is chronic for the remainder of our lives. The dysfunctional attempts to completely satisfy this urge is the cause for the degradation of many societies including our own as we males are glorified for treating the most beautiful creation in women as sex toys to reach orgasmic pleasure. Orgasms are fine and so is taking a woman and being faithful to her in and out of bed, but men are more than their orgasms, much more. Lust is the desire to reach or get as close to that orgasmic pleasure that is within us all. The first stage in knowing that there is a problem is recognizing that the problem exists. If the bottom line use for women is our lust and we see them as a desirable clump of flesh that gives us the orgasmic pleasure; then there is a problem. If all we want is that pleasure and after that pleasure we leave them and alleviate ourselves of commitment and responsibility; then there is a problem. This is where the principles in the male development model come in as we need our principles in place that we value ourselves. If we do not try to regain control of our desires, then one day we will be too old and decrepit to be desirable to whom we want, and all we will be left with is our desire, and no, pornography does not solve that problem.

The third and most destructive hunger is our ego. Our egos have been the root of nearly every evil done on a massive level in this world. It is about or acquisition of power as we see it, autonomy, praise, and all other people places and things that support the notion that we ourselves are in complete control of the affairs in our world. Again, the Masculine Development Model addresses this in the advanced stage of submission. If a male thinks all things revolve around him and are dependent on him, then one day, that male will be all that he has, quite simply. There will be no money, no loved ones, no palace, no praise, nothing. It will be an everlasting cycle of regret and resentment towards self that the male cannot sustain all that he wants and then tries to abandon the hungers, needs and desires that brought him to that place to show his strength and power, but he will find that he cannot escape the black hole of arrogance. The most basic and potent root of arrogance in that a male needs absolutely nothing and is completely self sufficient. If we persist on this path, we will lose all but ourselves and even then we will not want ourselves. Submission is key. Treating and controlling these hungers of food, lust and ego are key to Strength and our complete and unadulterated happiness as men completing our manhood.

©2012 Halim Naeem.com. All Rights Reserved.